Losing my medication, or losing my mind

I had only a couple of doses of my preventive migraine medication left when I finally called the doctor’s office to have the prescription refilled. My local pharmacy was closed on Sunday, the day I was set to run out after the morning dose, so I knew I’d be missing just one dose of medication before being able to resume my twice-daily dosage Monday morning.

It sounds pretty lame, but I was actually proud of myself for remembering to call the doctor (even though I was late in doing so) and even prouder I remembered to pick the dang medication up at the pharmacy. Things have been insanely busy at the bookshop this month (for which I’m very thankful) and, at home, life was in a state of sadness and turmoil as we started to realize that our beloved kitten’s health was getting worse as time passed. Between running home a few times a day to take care of Wally (the cat) and running a bustling new bookstore business, I’ve been falling into old patterns of meal-skipping, not exercising, and not always remembering to take my medicine on time (if at all).

And then my kitten died, and I cried so hard I gave myself a persistent three-day migraine (is crying a lot a trigger for anyone else? Sheesh, it’s a rough one—as if you’re not feeling worse enough already from the sadness!). And I lost my bottle of medication and the store got even busier and the house got even messier and I have now missed several days of medication and I don’t really care.
Ew, I sound so ugly. But I do think it’s good to have a post here once in a while about what can happen when life goes topsy-turvy and even some of my most important priorities (my health among them) get neglected and I don’t much care.

This is not to say I am not content in general. I love my town, I love my house (even though there are piles of laundry everywhere), I love my family, I love my friends, I love my boyfriend, I love my bookstore. My dream business is off to a spectacular start, and my migraines have been under control. So it’s not as if I’m deliberately engaging in some self-damaging behavior as a reaction to being depressed or despondent. I can’t explain it. I just don’t much care about looking for my medication right now. It’s somewhere around here. I’ll get to it.

Sheesh, I thought writing this post would make me get off my butt and find the missing prescription. But instead I’ll curl up with my book and try to not miss my little snuggle bunny cat too much. It’s overwhelming how I can feel so very sad but so very content at the same time. And maybe I’ll look for the medicine and put away all this laundry. Tomorrow.

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Comments

View Comments (10)
  • Suzanne Johnson
    7 years ago

    I so understand the not really caring about the medication. I take alot of different meds and it gets to you. Just the fact of having to take them. I feel the same about doctor appointments sometimes. It’s like I’ve had enough and need a break. I think that everyone has felt that way about something in their life at one time or another. Sometimes we just need a time out from it all.

  • Kathy Lowery
    7 years ago

    Sorry about the kitten. I get migraines and nasty nasty headaches from crying too. I thought it was just me. I just have learned not to cry so I don’t get one but that probobly isn’t healthy.

  • Aspen Marks
    7 years ago

    yelling at my kids, yelling at my husband, peri-menopausal rage, yep, those are some of my triggers.

  • Louise M. Houle
    7 years ago

    uggh, so hard to lose a pet 🙁 hang in there.

  • Krista Furgerson
    7 years ago

    So sorry about your kitten. You don’t sound ugly. You sound very stressed and worn out. All of us sometimes just don’t give a damn. It’s normal. Hope you start feeling better soon.

  • Marquita Fuchs
    7 years ago

    Sorry about the kitty.

  • Rebekah Tipton Ezell
    7 years ago

    Maybe the rx is in w/ the laundry. I’ve been known to do that. Sorry about your kitty.

  • Laura Price
    7 years ago

    sorry ((hugs)).

  • Beth Foulkes Lowe
    7 years ago

    Crying – even just more than a little bit – has always given me a wicked migraine. Totally stinks. I’m so sorry about your kitty. Not being able to cry about it and allow that natural release of emotion is one more cruel aspect of migraine. Please find your medication, though – I don’t mean to preach, but you know that missing your preventive meds for too long will set you back on the track for your migraines being out of control again. Don’t do that to yourself.

  • Linda Castellano
    7 years ago

    Awwww! Migraine Girl I loved your blog! I am very happy for you and feel for you w/the loss of your cat:( But I just could not believe it when you talked about crying giving you a migraine and the sense of feeling I had because I too will get a migraine if I bust out in a crying spell.I once again thought I was alone w/this.They say, just let out a good cry and you will feel so much better.Not for me! My head hurts way too much and your emotions cannot always be in control. Also I wanted to add that when you read a trigger list for migraines you hardly ever see crying on the list. It is just awful and not fair! Thank You for your honesty and from one sufferer to another best wishes for you and hopes for at least a few days of a break!( So we all can get that laundry done—uggggh!)

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