If my migraine could speak

If My Migraine Could Speak

If my migraine could speak...
…it would tell you all the silly things I have done.

My migraine must have a sense of humor because it makes me do ridiculous things. And I laugh at myself as it helps me make light of a painful situation. Here are a few scenarios told by my migraine:

You can’t have too much of a good thing, right?
I watched Lisa escape to the store one day despite the brain haze I was causing her. I couldn't help but mess with her shopping list, and she brought home a huge pack of toilet paper rolls. She had just bought the same pack the week before, but of course she didn't remember with me around!

Migraine Bonus? She didn’t have to buy toilet paper for six more months!

NYC trendsetter or complete fashion geek?
I'm no fashion police, but really who needs to wear earplugs and noise-canceling headphones? And why wear sunglasses at nighttime in the middle of downtown Manhattan like she was Jackie Onassis trying to escape the paparazzi? Oh, right, that's my fault. But no matter. Nothing beats the time she wore an ice pack while driving through the city!

Migraine Bonus? Who doesn’t like to set new fashion trends? Or be mistaken for a celebrity? Plus, she got serenaded a few times by random strangers singing, I wear sunglasses at night…

Circles are the new straight lines?
Even I got a little dizzy as she walked around and around a familiar neighborhood. I kept throwing her off by making her not recognize landmarks. Good thing for her GPS or we would have never made it home!

Migraine Bonus? It turned what should have been a 5 minute walk into a 20 minute cardio workout!

Poetry from pain brain?
I sometimes like to be a migraine-quake and shake Lisa's words around like magnetic poetry. I’ve stopped her mid-sentence to recall a word such as “syllabus” or “beetle." Little did she know that I hid them on her! But the funniest is when I come up with a new word. I believe the most successful was when I heard her say “it’s alarm-ing” about her alarm clock going off.

Migraine Bonus? Future Poet Laureate of course!

I’m Leaving on a Jet Plane? If only!
I like to travel and sometimes I mix it up a bit. One such occasion was when she went to visit her grandma by train. I led her to the wrong train and the wrong stop. We eventually got to her grandma's place anyway, so no harm done, right? Another time I made her forget to buy a train ticket. Oops! It's hard to mess with her anymore though. Now she asks a family member to book her tickets if my migraine party is taking up too much brain space. Oh well!

Migraine Bonus? Lisa can never say I didn't take her anywhere!

I could go on for hours, like the time Lisa burnt the carpet (don't migraine and cook, folks!), or the time she forgot if she had taken her preventive medicine (two pills are not better than one!). But now I want to hear from you! If your migraine could speak, what stories would it tell?

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