Migraine in Lockdown

Maybe I’m being dramatic but with every passing week, I find this coronavirus situation more and more baffling. In a matter of days, I lost my job, couldn’t spend time with my loved ones, and am being forced to stay inside.

Society as we knew it, movies and restaurants, bars and gyms (for some people), has been put momentarily on hold.

Life turned upside down

See, this is the first year I’ve been a real adult. I mean sure, I’ve been able to vote for several years, but I’m out of school. I’m in my own apartment. I [had] a job and am even washing my own clothes! All this freedom I thought I was buying into has now been taken. The pride and accomplishments I thought I felt feels sort of half-hearted?

I mean, hopefully, we’re all socially distancing ourselves. Taking legitimate precautions in order to flatten out the curve. As a resident of New York state, we’re facing some pretty strict measures in order to protect each other from making things any more inevitable than they already might become.

Migraine help feels out of reach

The other day I saw a commercial for Aimovig on TV (Since when have I watched cable television? Times are tough.) and it felt so far away, migraine solutions that were further than my house, my own personal state-suggested quarantine. So, it made me realize...I can’t see my neurologist!

This is one of the most nerve-wracking parts. I can’t see my neurologist! Waiting in a lobby with strangers, while waiting to be alone in a room with a health care professional? Not sure if that’s the best idea! Not being able to check-in, especially during this continued time of consistent anxiety, has put me in a pickle.

Taking care of myself

That being said, I guess what I’m eventually getting at, behind all the “sadness and loneliness” I was painting earlier, is, I have to trust myself.

Limited travel and an extremely heightened use of screens all day to fend off the boredom (that coupled with anxiety and a random sleep pattern) is a recipe for a serious migraine stew. Having lived through this journey for several years, I can see these stimuli a mile away. With every passing day, I find myself with a new series of challenges. With nothing but time, how can I take care of myself?

There’s something about this isolation that gets to me, as obvious as that sounds. Without a lot of distractions, I find myself constantly checking in on myself, even if I'm not good at it yet. Constantly trying to put together migraine-friendly meals without risking going out until necessary. These are things that I’m new at anyway, having moved out less than a year ago. Now I’m trying to tackle them with the pressure of COVID-19.

I know I'm going to be okay

Migraine has given me a set of tools that I’m thankful for. Sure, I’m very anxious, but I think it’s helped me become resourceful in times of isolation. Attacks have made me bedridden and food has been sensitive, so when the world goes wild I know that I can try to manage myself in my little self-quarantine.

Even if it’s scary I know that I’m not going through this alone, even if there’s nobody else in this room with me. Oh, you know what I mean!

 

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