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The Important Day YOU Completely Missed

The Important Day YOU Completely Missed

Recently, patient advocate, Janet Geddis, otherwise known as, “The Migraine Girl, wrote an article for the community about the important day she completely missed due to a vicious migraine. The question was then posed to you, the community, to share any experiences you’ve had where migraine completely changed your plans or altered your day. Your responses were so incredible, and ranged from missing weddings, funerals, children’s school functions, and so many other important events, that we wanted to capture some of your stories here. Clearly, you are not alone in your battle with migraine, and having plans completely altered due to circumstances out of your control. Many of you cited that you were “not sure it’s possible to narrow it down to just one”, and that there were “too many times to list”, however, we compiled some of your memorable stories below.

Weddings:

“I missed my best friend’s wedding due to a migraine. And yes, I was supposed to be in the wedding.”

“I had to have my maid of honor drive me home from my rehearsal dinner the night before my wedding, leaving my husband and bridal party with my family from out of town. I still feel sad that I wasn’t able to be with my guests and enjoy the apparently delicious meal my in-laws graciously planned at a historic inn.

Funerals, Deaths, and Births:

“I missed my own mother’s funeral. Yes, you read that right. MY OWN MOTHER’S!  The guilt and anxiety of possibly not making it to the funeral just started the vicious cycle. You know it. The more anxious I became, the worse I felt…the worse I felt, the more anxious I became.”

“I was with my Mom all day as she lay comatose and near death, I had to leave to drive home as M. took vicious hold of me. My sisters left too and my mom passed alone a few hours later”

“The worst one hit during delivery of my youngest son. I didn’t get to hold him or even meet him for almost 24 hours.”

“During the birth of my son. I didn’t really get to meet him until he was a day old”

Vacations:

I flew halfway across the United States on my dream whale watching trip and got a migraine in the middle of it and spent the day in the cabin throwing up instead. Everyone else was outside on the boat close to the whales”

“I was in Greece and went over to where the Olympics started and on the way via ferry, migraine hit and I was spewing, shaking, etc. really bad. I sat on a bench whilst family went round Olympia. Bad day.”

“I have missed whole vacations and had vacations cut short.”

Family and Personal Plans:

“Having to make my husband and daughter miss a Kennedy Center performance of a major musical…and we were on the Metro nearly there. I thought I could stick it out for my daughter’s sake—she was so excited—but the pain became unbearable. Bless them, they turned back with sympathy and understanding.”

“I missed my daughter’s induction in the National Junior Honor Society. She was so disappointed.”

“I decided to audition for a local community theater play and was cast in a few roles. The morning of our very last show, I woke up with a migraine. I tried sleeping it off but of course that didn’t help, so I went to the ER. There was no understudy, no one else knew the lines, I have no idea what they did to cover. Needless to say I was not invited to the cast party, nor was I invited to audition for anything else.”

“We were going to my hubbies great-grandmom’s bday party. We had the car packed and I had to run inside to the bathroom because I got sick. I wasn’t in any shape to go to the party.”

“I was all dressed and ready to go to Thanksgiving dinner at my mother-in-laws house. I was waiting for everyone else when I got hit hard with a migraine. I felt like I got hit in the head with a frying pan. I missed the whole day.”

“This past Father’s Day, my husband went to dinner with his folks while I stayed in a dark room.”

“I had to have my mom come get me at the mall while I was shopping because I had such bad migraine I couldn’t see or walk”

As one community member put it, “We bear it, cope, occasionally must give in to it, then pick up the pieces and get back to our busy lives once more”. You are not alone in your battle, and having a strong support system, including our community, can help you rebuild from your missed day, and continue to move forward.”

Comments

  • Judy H
    3 years ago

    I can’t even recall a specific event that I missed – because there have been so many. Anniversary celebrations (mine), birthdays, Christmas, Thanksgiving – you name it I have missed it in the 40+ years that I have had migraines. I do recall some more recent events missed – the funeral of our church choir director (I was a choir member) and the installation of our new pastor. I also recall when my daughter was a teenager, she had migraine-induced vomiting for 2 days with her monthly cycle – which frequently hit while we were on vacation. I always stayed with her in our vacation rental cottage while the rest of our family went on with the vacation plans for the day. I felt obligated to keep her company (even if only on the premises) while she was suffering in a location far from home.
    This subject reminds me of missing a lot of my children’s earliest years. When my children played house, whoever was the “mommy” would tell the other kids: “you can play quietly here in the family room – I have to go lie down with a headache”. It broke my heart to think that my children spent their early childhood years believing that that was typical mommy behavior.

  • SandraLee
    3 years ago

    I’ve missed this whole year of 2016. After 15 days of migraines in Dec. 2015, I decided to stay home and try different treatment approaches until I could function again. Nothing has worked and I’ve been home for the past 10 months only going out about once a week for basic errands. Fortunately I’m on disability so I don’t have to worry about getting fired again as was the case for so long before qualifying. However, my life is non existent and I just wait for the FDA approval of the CGRP antagonist which I know could be a year or more. I’m really not envious of people with life threatening illnesses but even those going through chemo and such have more of a life than I do.

  • davidoricardo
    3 years ago

    I was 16. End of the school year. Schools Wimbledon. We had already had a fierce first round match in the doubles and I had to play a deciding singles game that would be an epic 3 setter. I did it – brilliant – I was elated. Of course many of you will see what’s coming. By the time I got home and the relief had set in – CRASH! One of the worst – aura – pounding head – sickness – cramps – I wanted to die. Result I had to try to get a substitute player – disaster. We lost but I will never know if that was down to my absence or not. It’s 40 years later and that day will not go away

  • RockyMtnGuy
    3 years ago

    I only had relaxation migraines, so I was always sick on my own time and had an exemplary attendance record. However, at one company I worked for, a professional employee I knew went to his manager’s office and told him he needed to go home because he had a migraine. The manager told him he couldn’t go home because he wasn’t really sick. About half way through this discussion, the employee vomited into the manager’s waste paper basket, and didn’t stop vomiting until his stomach was empty. After that, there was no discussion about whether you needed to go home with a migraine – the manager didn’t want you to come into his office. He said, “Don’t talk to me about it, just go home.”

  • SandraLee
    3 years ago

    That’s the thing about migraines, people just don’t believe you have a serious disorder/disease. If you try to take care of yourself before the situation becomes critical they think you’re faking it. 🙁

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