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Living with Migraine

"That's always your excuse!"

  • By Lisa.A

    Yesterday I got a call literally about 5 minutes after I’d taken my imitrex pill, grabbed a cup of tea and announced I was heading upstairs to my darkened room to rest, stating, “Geeze, I don’t know why lately I’m getting slammed with these every day all of a sudden, I gotta go lie down!” So my friend from work calls – now mind you IT’S MY DAY OFF – and she wants me to come in and keep her company (??????) while she gets work done – suggesting I could also get my work done – as it’s end of the month crunch time. No, I tell her, I don’t really want to, and besides, it’s my day off. “Please?” No, I don’t feel well. “Please, I’ll buy you lunch!” “No, seriously, I don’t feel well, I have a migraine, I just took my meds, I’m going to go lie down!” – Her reply? “Oh, you always use that excuse!? My reply? “I need to stop talking now. I’m going to go lie down. Good bye.” And I hung up.

    I wanted to strangle her. She’s asking for help, I can see that – but to say something like that to me? Really?

    I went a little while with no headaches, but horrendous back pain the last few weeks, and I was supremely grateful. Now the headaches are back, every single day, and I don’t know why. Comparing the two types of pain, I can honestly say I would rather have the back pain and the problems walking than this. Kill me now. Just kill me. I’d rather be dead. And she says this is an excuse??? I want to strangle someone. I’m so mad. And I feel like I want to cry. I hate this. God I hate this.

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  • By Nancy Harris Bonk Moderator

    Hi Lisa.A,

    Welcome to the discussion forum and thank you for your comments. I understand your frustration, but it sounds like you handled your friend very nicely! You explained yourself, which you really didn’t need to do, and then said good-bye. Nicely done! It’s unfortunate she isn’t very understanding, I’m sorry about that. But we need to take care of ourselves – especially on our days off!! We have information on migraine you may want to share with your friend if you think she would be interested; https://migraine.com/blog/when-migraines-endanger-our-friendships/.

    It’s rough when we have daily pain. Are you by chance taking something on a daily or near daily basis to help relieve your pain? The thing is if we take pain medications and/or migraine medications, whether they are over-the-counter or prescription, we can create another problem called medication overuse headache or moh. Moh was formerly called rebound and is very unpleasant. If we are in an moh cycle our attacks will be more difficult to treat and we can end up in a daily cycle of pain that is hard to treat. Here is more information on moh; https://migraine.com/blog/help-how-can-i-not-overuse-migraine-medications/.

    Something else I’d like to mention is if we have four or more severe attacks a month its time to talk to our doctor about migraine prevention. Episodic (occasional) migraine can transform in chronic migraine fairly quickly for some of us. When you get a minute, take a look at this article; https://migraine.com/blog/migraine-management-essential-4-preventive-treatment/.

    I hope this helps – hang in there!
    Nancy
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  • By Leilani Siplon

    Lisa,
    My sister says the same thing to me, too. Makes you wanna slap someone, right? And I would if I knew my head wouldn’t pound sharply after. 🙂

    It’s difficult when people don’t understand. But you did the right thing when you hung up. Sometimes we have to just move on and take care of ourselves and ignore what others think.

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