Invisible illness

By mbloor

1 min read

I have suffered with chronic migraines since the age of 11 years old. I was always told throughout puberty that I would grow out of having chronic migraines. However I am now 22 years old and my chronic migraines are getting worse, my life is being ruined because of them, I'm at the end of my tether and I don't know what to do next.

Over the past 12 years it's just been popping pills which come with there share of side effects. In 2014 I tried Botox on the NHS which reduced the attacks for about 1 year. I'm now at the point where I am desperate and is scrapping money together to pay to see a specialist in London.

I have never felt so desperate. There is a constant fear hanging over me all the time 'am I going to get a migraine'. The amount of days I have to have off work is embarrassing and frustrating because I love my job yet I feel there is a massive barrier in the way because of my migraines. I try to keep positive but sometimes I just cry thinking is this what life is all about. Pushing yourself from one day to the next, suffering daily, no social life, bed bound and depressed.

To top it off I believe that unless an individual has experienced a migraine themselves or knows someone who suffers they have very little understanding. With my migraines they begin with the aura, telling people you can't suddenly see doesn't always go down to well as they don't understand that a migraine is not 'just a headache'. This is the same when having take a couple of days off work to recover 'just for a headache'. It really angers me and I'd love to scream and shout about it but it's my invisible illness, people can't see it to understand the pain, frustration, exhaustion. I just wish I could get some relief.

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Member
Praying for you! It's so so hard! I wish I had some easy answers too. Keep the faith. We CAN do this . There is HOPE
1. mbloor Member
 Thank you so much! I really needed these positives words today, I have had a complete breakdown over my migraines but you are right we just need to keep our hope up and have faith. We can do this.
aks868 Member
I totally feel your pain. It is frustrating. My PCP just asked me how many migraine days in bed do you have a week and when I said 2-3. She said, that that was good. But then I told her that doesn't take into account the prodrome and postdrome--both of which are awful--and then the other days that I just suck it up and deal with the pain as best I can. All I can say, is you are not defined by your migraine. You are so much more--that you even have a job is amazing. We, here, are all cheering for you and hoping you have more better days than bad. Keep hoping and fighting and being proud of all that you have accomplished despite the migraines.
1. mbloor Member
 It is very frustrating, I am glad I'm not the only one dealing with these issues, sometimes you can feel so alone and an inconvenience to others. People just don't seem to understand, the postdrome absolutly wipes me out! I feel like a zombie for days and you have to use all your strength to just try carry on acting as if your fine when you all you really want to do is curl up in bed. But thank you so much for your kind words, they are really uplifting and it's just what I needed to hear. Sometimes it's so easy to give up when your feeling so low and fed up but you are right we just need to pick ourselves back up when we fall and keep fighting. We won't let migraines win.
blinkylights Member
I'm so sorry you are going through this. Telling someone you can't see sounds so dramatic, but it's the truth! "Normal" people don't suddenly lose their vision, but we know what you are going through. I hope you find comfort, relief and peace.