Seven years and counting

I have had chronic daily migraines for seven years. I began having migraines at about five years old. At least that's the age I remember. My mom called them sick headaches. I would lay my face against the wall in my bedroom where it was nice and cool for relief. I remember getting so sick and my mom putting cool wash cloths on my head and giving me baby aspirins.

They followed me into my teens always getting them around my period, at least having four a month.

When I got pregnant at 20, I did not have one headache. I was in heaven, but they came back in the hospital as soon as I gave birth. I had to stay and extra day due to a migraine. In my twenties I had about 4-6 headaches a month. My doctor put me on Corgard, a heart medication to fight them daily. He was ahead of his time I was told.

In my thirties they increased to 6-8 migraines a month. More meds were prescribed, without helping.

In 1996, I turned 40, got divorced, lost my father, took my first full time job, had a hystectomy, started a new relationship and bought a new house. I had about 10 migraines a month. My first date ended abruptly with a tremdous migraine before dinner, and I had to go to the ER. He asked me out again anyway!

Into my forties I had more migraines than ever. I was getting up to 12-15 a month, trying to juggle single motherhood and full time work. The plates were falling. I lost my job in 2002 due to 9/11.

I found another job that didn't last long, it was performance oriented and I was calling in sick constantly with migraines. I went to work for a not nice chiropractor who was convince he could fix me and that I needed to be medication free. That lasted about a month. I was having daily migraines, so I went back on the meds. Three years later he fired me because I took a sick day on a Monday morning because of a migraine. He accused me of not being a team player. Just a month before that he gave me a raise and I was employee of the month. He fought my unemployment, but I won the case.

I found a new job with a great recruiting company but by then I had been having daily headaches for two years. I told no one, and medicated myself in order to do my job.
I was an executive administrator and the first year there was voted employee of the year. I love that place and they loved me.

In 2008 I went to Thomas Jefferson Headache Center in Phila, PA. They were a very popular center. They put me in the hospital immediately and began medicating me. By day nine I was headache free for 24 hrs so they sent me home. The next day, migraine came back. I was taking alot of meds. Going back and forth to Phila monthly, still having migraines every day.

Eventually I got so bad that I collopsed at work and 911 had to be called. That was my downfall. I was asked to take time off to recover. I was off for three months. The business was moving to a new location, so zi called in to say I wanted to come back and pack my things for the move. I was asked to come in to talk. When I got there, my things were packed up. I was told my position was being eliminated due to the economy. I was devastated. They told me to apply for long term disability. Which I did, and got.
I am at home 24/7 with daily migraines. I get botox every three months. Not much helps me. I miss alot in life, due to the pain or being too medicated to function.

I don't know when this will end. I never thought it would last seven years. I keep counting.

I am on a trial list for an electode implant. I am at the point that I will try anything, and have. My hope is that one day someone will find a cure or something to ease my pain. I exist, I don't live. I don't enjoy this life. It is a difficult way to exist, day after day.

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