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So tired

I’m really tired right now. I know it’s just being run down and will get better, but it’s always hard to explain to family and friends that I just want to lay down and sleep, or watch mindless tv and not move. Lately my memory has been especially bad, and I’ve been doing a lot of word searching and being unfocused. I get daily headaches, tolerable migraines, and when things get bad I get knocked flat with a horrid several day overwhelming migraine. I’m constantly being asked how my head is, if I’m in pain, but people always seem to forget that it’s not just pain I deal with. It’s light and sound sensitivity that has me wearing sunglasses in the grocery store, or nausea, depression, vertigo that makes me unbalanced and occasionally fall. Hopefully I’ll get some sleep tonight and feel less tired tomorrow. If not, then at least I have caffeine and this site where I can read stories and feel completely understood for the first time in years.

This article represents the opinions, thoughts, and experiences of the author; none of this content has been paid for by any advertiser. The team does not recommend or endorse any products or treatments discussed herein. Learn more about how we maintain editorial integrity here.


  • Sally
    5 years ago

    It’s a double whammy. Dealing with the pain and accompanying symptoms of a bad migraine, then the feeling of being totally wiped out for days after the pain finally goes away. Then add in the guilt for not being able to snap right back when everyone thinks you should be okay now that your migraine is “over” when you only want to lay on the couch.

  • lmbrackett
    5 years ago

    Thank you for this post. You have described how I have been feeling for the past few months but trying desperately to downplay in my mind and to others. You have helped me to remember that this is very real and that I need to recognize it, accept it and take better care of myself. Praying we all find relief.

  • Jayme
    5 years ago

    Hi Heather, Ive been a regular reader of this page for about a year now, this is the first time I’ve commented, I’ve had migraines from the age of about 7 or 8 (my first unknowing migraine) and ongoing (now almost 21) , I’m trying to hold down a business, relationship and a university degree and I can safely say I can relate to you 110%. Im also a daily sufferer, lately my memory has been worryingly bad and searching for words as I describe like a slot machine through my mind, taking several attempts to get the right word. I also am a regular sunglass indoors wearer. The vertigo lately has been pretty bad and stairs are now becoming a challenge and the fatigue is overwhelming. This is the first place that I have come and can feel like I’m not being a burden, like I’m not being “lazy” and like I’m not crazy. Keep your head up and just remember your not alone 🙂

  • SunupShutterbug
    5 years ago

    You have just described my life to a T.

  • Elizabeth
    5 years ago

    I live that too, Heather. I stay so fatigued. And light and noise…. oh my.

  • Beth
    5 years ago

    Hi Heather and everyone else!! I’m walking in a fog today. Last evening and all night I was dealing with a monster migraine…it’s still there, just not as bad (down to a 4 instead of the 6). My DH is trying to be understanding but it’s hard on him. He doesn’t understand, even though he works in an ER. I go next week to see a neurologist…I’m not sure what he’s going to say or do for me. After years of headaches, I was finally diagnosed with migraines in August. I only hope that I get some preventative medication. Oh…and I’ve been in 6 accidents that resulted in whiplash. Was to see a neuro surgeon last year and I’m not bad enough for surgery. Add to this..degenerative disc disease and arthritis though out my spine.

  • Anne
    5 years ago

    I completely relate! I spent the entire weekend in bed – going from sleeping to getting up to eat something, then back to bed. I had someone say that sounds like heaven to sleep that much – but it’s not. I’m exhausted. When I have a migraine, even typing is too much. It’s like I’ve taken sleeping pills. BTW – I don’t eat gluten, nuts, sugar, soda, artificial sweeteners, dairy, corn, soy, eggs, red meat, etc. and still get this symptom.

    It’s hard for people to understand – they think I’m being lazy. What I am is exhausted on a core level with a sprinkling of dizziness and mental fog that makes it impossible to do anything.

  • Court
    5 years ago

    Please look into the possibility of diet changes. Also many of the symptoms you speak of are the same as mine. I was diagnosed with MS in April. I had many of your symptoms. Look into homeopathic doctors as well. It takes a while to truly believe that diet could be doing this. Check out research as well on candida and leaky gut. I am going though this right now.

  • Ginny
    5 years ago

    I’m right there with you Heather. I truly feel the same as you. It’s been such a relief finding fellow migranieurs and to know I’m not alone. My migraines so often make me feel so isolated and alone.

  • Adiantum
    5 years ago

    I hear what you’re saying. And thank you for saying it.
    I’ve just spent another weekend laid completely flat by a bad migraine. And am struggling with a partner who seems to think that I am either pretending, overreacting or intentionally choosing to have a migraine.
    It helps to be able to read about others’ experiences, and know that I’m not alone in having friends and family who don’t really understand. I often think that the only people who really understand how debilitating migraines can be are the people who’ve had one.
    Thanks again for sharing your experience!

  • terry
    5 years ago

    “At Wits End”
    I have the same symptoms as “So Tired”
    It is so frustrating, I try to explain it to family and friends also and I feel like everyone thinks that I am just making it up or I’m just lazy and a slacker. That’s not it at all. I just feel so overwhelmed with depression, a heaviness that I can only describe as not wanting to go on. Having this tension and headaches all the time and migraines that last for days. I take Maxalt when I know they are coming on, that is the only reason I get up and function at all. I am going to a Neurologist in a week to have a work-up done and see if they can tell me something. I also have had three car accidents where I was rear-ended. The first one was just one whiplash, but the second accident was double whiplash where I was hit and then pushed into the car in front of me. So I am constantly having to baby my neck. If I lay the wrong way or use the wrong pillow, I am in pain that I cannot get to go away without taking something and that makes me a Zombie. Sorry to be complaining so much. I feel for all of you and wish you well.

  • Paco
    5 years ago

    Sorry for the pain and your anguish. Validation is very important; especially when others cannot or choose not to see. One of my greatest moments in life, when a professional told me; it’s “tough” being you. I felt vindicated. I have other health problems from two other head & spine afflicted accidents. My best thoughts are with you. Paco

  • Angie
    5 years ago

    Heather, people do seem to only focus on the head pain. I was recently hospitalized for the 3rd time this year to try to break an intractable migraine and even the neurologists seemed to be primarily focused on my pain level. Don’t get me wrong, I want the head pain to go away, or at least drop in intensity, but migraine is so much more.

    On the bright side, there are other migraineurs out there who will not automatically assume I’m drunk as I walk through a store with my sunglasses on occasionally bumping into things, that is on the rare occasion I actually leave my house. At least here I can control the light and noise.

    Just know you are not alone.

  • Katie M. Golden moderator
    5 years ago

    I’m glad you feel understood here at! Thanks for sharing your story.

    You mentioned that your memory has been worse lately and you are having trouble finding words. Are you on Topamax? These are common side effects on higher doses of Topamax. Ask your doctor about it if that’s what you are taking. On the flip side, even after I got off of Topamax (for other reasons), I still find myself forgetting words and having a lousy memory sometimes!

    Go rest and don’t feel guilty about it!!
    -Katie Moderator

  • Not-Again
    5 years ago

    Heather, I’m so sorry you are having a bad migraine and all the side affects they have on our bodies, minds, souls, social isolation, and energy. First, may I ask you to forgive yourself for having migraines? Migraine is a biological medical disorder/disease. It’s also mostly silent and no one can see it. You did not, I imagine, every ask to have migraines. It is not your fault. The best we can do is take it one breath at a time and do the very best we can to take care of ourselves during the migraine days. Allow yourself to rest, recover, and renew. For me, the only time I deal the best with my migraines is when I’m not having one and can plan or prepare ahead of time for the next one. I’ve lost family members and friends over my migraines. My sadness for awhile. Their loss forever. You are important, you matter to others and the world, and we need you. Take the best care of yourself that you can right now and let the rest fall away.

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