FOMO and Drinking with Migraine
The fear of missing out is something that I didn't think would stick to me. I had always heard of FOMO and just regarded it as when people weren't confident enough in themselves. That they would let other people's actions affect them so deeply as to instill feelings of isolation and longing. It seemed silly to me. But, as migraine often does, it rewrote my perception of what it meant to be missing out.
I never drank much
I was raised fairly conservatively. Heck, my grandma, to this day, still doesn't like my ex-girlfriend because she would drink. Not even socially, just at all! When I went to college and explored alcohol for myself, I found that there were several hurdles I had to jump through to have as much of a good time as the ones my friends were having. I had always heard of what drinking did, but I needed to experience it firsthand like everything in my life.
Giving alcohol a try
I remember hanging out with my friends, taking shots of bourbon after a long day of filming a movie that we had been working on. We were celebrating a successful shoot and started doing some shots. I had never had an 80 proof liquor, but decided, why not?! I live right down the street, so I could just walk home in the morning, and it would be fine.
It wasn’t fine
I remember being so drunk and sleepy that I just laid on the ground, facing the wall, until I passed out. The following day, I trudged home, shoes in hand as though I had gone on a wild bender, and proceeded to yuck in my basement toilet for the early hours of the day. The head pain that I received was unlike anything I had ever experienced. It shattered my skull like an electrified hammer. Imprinting a neural scar in my psyche that I cannot shake to this day. It was on that fateful morning, several years ago, that I realized that…
I couldn't let this happen again.
I haven't gotten drunk since then
I experience migraine enough, as it is, so why would I want to inflict this sort of excruciating pain on myself by my own accord? Ever since then, I haven't gotten nearly that drunk to experience the hangover from hell. It's meant that I've had to skimp on the parties and get-togethers. I drive myself to friends' houses to have an excuse not to partake and find myself missing that camaraderie. I liked feeling warm and close to my friends that day and feeling on top of the world, only to have that world explode the following day. I do have FOMO regarding getting tipsy with friends, but it isn't worth the ensuing pain that follows. There are PLENTY of ways to have fun that don't involve self-destruction.
Setting boundaries with migraine
For me, migraine is often about finding alternative solutions to have the same fun that my friends might even take for granted. Don't get me wrong, I'm jealous but not vindictive. There's nothing wrong with setting up boundaries for yourself. After all, you're the one waking up with head pain!!
How much has your migraine disease changed or evolved over time?