One Man's Stink is Another Man's Treasure

By Sawyer Matheny

2 min read

One of the hardest parts about moving, for me, has been trying to feel comfortable. With so many aspects of your life being uprooted, spun around, and settling somewhere else, comfort is almost entirely left to the side. You’ve gotta find a new place, sort through everything you own, and debate on living your life as a stuff-free nomad.

Basic necessities are comforting

I personally find comfort in my basic necessities. The things I’ve found I cannot live without and help me unwind and lower my guard!

My back pack filled with my computer, charging cords, relief medicine and water
My TV and video game consoles
A bed

Sure, these pillars are what make me feel comfortable, materialistically speaking, however…

What I struggle with the most, are new people and, especially, new roommates.

Walking into a strong smell

See, my girlfriend had found some roomies online when she made her own big move to NYC, before my own move, so without any sort of background check or picture to speak of, I had the fortune of being introduced smell-first when I walked through her doorway.

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That sounded crass and first impressions have never been my strong suit.

This person did not emit some sort of poisonous or noxious cloud nor were they especially leaky. I’ve surely had my stinky days as have y’all, but it was her cooking that did me in.

I walked in after a long drive through queens, to find her roommate frying chicken with hot, stanky oil. This stench was so strong it nearly burned my eyelashes off. I’ve had fried foods before, but that unpredicted stench of oil and… vinegar?

How do I say the scent is a trigger?

Nearly tore my a** a new migraine. How could I share my triggers with this stranger? I am a guest in her house and it’s not her fault that her food scorched my nose and brain like napalm?

A couple of days later, I was sharing this encounter with my mom, and she said something pretty interesting.

Oh, I know what you mean. That smell of fried grease and oil used to fill up my grandma’s house. But the longer she did that, the more it reminded me of her.

A fresh perspective

Dang. I had been looking at this from such a cynical perspective that I hadn’t even considered this. Here I am, dragging this girl for her cuisine prep, when to my mom, it would have reminded her of home and my darling great-grandma. It’s wild how one person’s stink is another person’s loving memory.

Maybe this is special to my girlfriend’s roommate too. Perhaps these are traditions passed down, like my mom’s mom passed to her. No, this sentiment won’t make me hurt less, but I’ve found myself less angry and more compassionate to someone’s cuisine. Am I projecting my own life’s journey on a stranger to justify not having to speak up? Perhaps.

All I can do, as somebody’s brand new guest, is try and feel comfortable in my own body. Is that my social anxiety talking, or my willingness to adapt? That’s why I actually put my mask back on in the kitchen. Not only did it help a ton, but I was able to avoid migraine for the time being. I may not be as lucky next time, which why I’ve always got that backpack with migraine meds to ensure max comfort at all times!

This article represents the opinions, thoughts, and experiences of the author; none of this content has been paid for by any advertiser. The Migraine.com team does not recommend or endorse any products or treatments discussed herein. Learn more about how we maintain editorial integrity here.

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Melissa Arnold Community Admin
Perspective matters so much, Sawyer. We often talk here about the mental/emotional aspect of migraine, and how it can really make a difference in how we get through each day. I love how self-aware you are, and it's special that you choose to share these experiences with us. Great idea with wearing your mask inside -- just don't forget to wash it on the regular! The last thing you need is putting on your mask outside only to discover it smells like oil. 😉 Take care! -Melissa, <a href='http://migraine.com' target='_blank'>migraine.com</a> team
azreynolds Member
Sawyer, Smells are my number 1 trigger. I actually have lived in isolation since 2015 because of this hyper sensitive sense of smell that I have. (The covid isolation was no big deal for me since I've lived like this for so long.) However, it's not food that sets me off, but rather perfumes. I can smell the perfumes in people's laundry detergents from 30 ft away...and get a full blown migraine with one whiff. I think it's because I walk around with a mild migraine every day, so it's not that it's a trigger, but more a super reaction. I can't go out to restaurants or stores. Not even the post office because they have plug ins. I can even smell people's underarm deodorant. But I shouldn't complain because my "super power" has actually come in handy 3 times by alerting me to electrical fires before they happened because I could smell the ozone before the flames started. Last time, I was outside and I traced it to a house 2 houses away and across the street. Apparently it started to have electrical problems in the AC unit. I followed my sniffer to the source, banged on their door until they came out, and told them to turn off the AC, just before it burst into flames. Their newborn son was asleep in the room beside the AC. I've also tracked down more gas leaks than I can remember. Last time in my own home, it was the 3red one I had smelled in our old house we had just moved into. The gas company said the reading was so low on their gadgets that they couldn't believe a human could even smell it. So I can personally understand your reaction to that unusual smell setting you off. It's funny that I used to hate the smell of vinegar because it was so strong, but now that I can't be around any cleaning products due to their added perfumes, vinegar or alcohol are the only things I can clean with so I have learned to love the smell of vinegar! It's all about our attitude, or perception as you said, isn't it?!
1. Melissa Arnold Community Admin
 Me again, AZReynolds (I just replied to you elsewhere) -- that is WILD. Have you always had such a strong sense of smell? And how are your other senses in comparison? I have really poor vision and have always had amazing hearing and smell. My mom always said that God gave me strengths in other areas to help me compensate. But I don't have the distance you do. Truly a blessing and a curse when migraine gets thrown into the mix. I'm glad you've been able to use it as an asset, though! I bet your neighbors are grateful, too. If only we could all look out for one another in that way. -Melissa, <a href='http://migraine.com' target='_blank'>migraine.com</a> team

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