How migraines have crippled my life

So I have always suffered from headaches from a young age, then in my early 20’s I was diagnosed with migraines, they were under control for a long time, up until November of 2005. I was at work the day I got hit with this feeling I had never had before. I had been lightheaded, shaky, faint and had a major head pain all day, as the day went on I became worse and worse. I had a nurse check my blood pressure and sugar levels. My blood pressure was a little high and sugar was on the low side. I was having a difficult time talking, my speech was slurred, shaky, slow and hard to understand, it was hard to hold my head up, I was extremely pail and lost feeling in my right side. The nurse called my boss and told her I needed to get to the ER ASAP because she thought I was having a TIA. I got to the ER and the doctor there told me that nothing was wrong and that I either had some water stuck in my ear or had a case of vertigo. He never ran any tests or drew labs, gave me a shot of phenergan for the nausea and darivacet for the pain and sent me home. I went home and went to bed, the next day I didn’t feel any better so I called my family doc and they set me up to have a CAT Scan done, it showed that I had a possible aneurysm, so the next day I had to go have a MRI done and it came back clean. I went to a larger ER a few days later and again gave me several different pain killer shots and sent me home. I had been to my neurologist three times within eight weeks and he said there was nothing more he could do for me as an outpatient so he told me about the Diamond Headache Clinic in Chicago and told me to call and make an appointment to be seen and put into the hospital.

So on Jan 2nd 2006 my parents and I left for Chicago, at this point I had been dealing the a grade 6 pain migraine for eight weeks and was ready to cut my head off. I met with the doc and he put me in the hospital, I was in for 11 days, had all sorts of tests done and was put on lots of IV meds. They used what is called DHE-45, it helped out quite a bit, but was still suffering with some major pain. They had me get facet blocks done in my neck and that seemed to of helped. Once the migraine broke I was sent home with a bunch of new meds and with DHE in shot form to give myself at home. Things had been going great till September of 06 and I got struck down again with real bad migraines and ended up in the hospital once again for ten days. Since I have been in the hospital four more times with each stay getting longer and longer. This last time I was in for 18 days, they put me in a detox program so I could get off a lot of my meds. I do feel better being off all the meds that I had been on, was taken off of ten meds, now I only take five meds daily and have my abortive to use when a migraine hits. They put me on and MAOI (Emsam patch) I put a new one on every 24hrs and it delivers 6mg throughout that time. Unfortunately my migraine still has not broken, I have had it with the pain, I don’t know what to do for it any more. I just did a triple shot over a week (haldol, ativan and cogentin combination) and just finished up zyprexa. I need to be careful on what I take now since I’m on the MAOI, I can no longer use; triptans, SSRIs, Tricyclic antidepressants, serotonin and norepinephrine reuptake inhibitors along with some other medications. I also need to watch what I eat as well, some meds and foods could make me extremely sick or even kill me.

I haven’t been to work in over a month now, I did try one day and couldn’t even make it four hours before I had to come home. I know I’m going to loose my job if I can’t get better. I love my job for the most part, but I just can’t keep putting my body through all of this. I don’t want to go for disability/SSRI but there is nothing else I can do. I’m worried that I’m going to end up back in the hospital. I even had to move back home with my parents because my medical bills have put a major crimp in my checkbook and no longer can make it on my own. I go to the chiropractor and get adjusted to help with the neck pain as well. I’m just so feed up with all of it. I’m glad that there are other people out there like me who suffer from such debilitating migraines. It frustrates me that some people think I’m putting on a front and faking it all for attention. Hell I would never fake something like this or wish it on my worst enemy; no one should have to go through what we all go through. A few years ago it all got to be way too much for me and I tried to kill myself by taking an excessive amount of pills, it didn’t work, which I was thankful for and will never do it again, but I can’t help but keep in the back of my head that it would be better if I wasn’t around anymore, then I look around and know that it could be worse. I’m just very depressed and stressed out; I need for this to end so I can get my life back. I know someday there will be a cure for them, I just don’t think it will be in my lifetime.

Cyn