My Life in Purgatory

I am a 53 year old female that has only known headache pain her entire life. My parents were young when they had me and never took me to the doctor when I was in agonizing pain to get it checked out. It wasn’t until I was 18 and left home that I was able to see a doctor, actually several, and be diagnosed as having migraines. I remember, when I was between eight and ten years old, going into a shared family bathroom in the middle of night and taking those little orange Bayer aspirin so I could try to sleep.

The emotional & mental impact of migraine

As an adult, I worked in the legal and medical professions for 25 years until I finally had to give it all up because of the unending pain, fatigue, depression, anxiety, and slowly losing the ability to remember things. I have been trying to get disability over the last four to six years, but I have people who don’t even know me making determinations about my life. If I think about it too much, my depression goes from really bad to horrible because I spend so much time crying. Even one of the two doctors chosen by the Commonwealth said I was disabled but they still want to deny me benefits. This was their own doctor.

Yes, I am disabled!

I have had to file a lawsuit in Federal Court to try and get disability. I don’t know what else to do. If I could work I would. I enjoyed working but it all came crashing down and became too much for me to handle. My employers were not sympathetic back almost eleven years ago. I don’t have money for more doctor visits. It’s all I can do to pay for generic medication and get by every month.

Sleeping in a cool and darkened room is my gateway to try and avoid some of the pain. Light sensitivity is the bane of my existence so many of the rooms in the house are darkened. I wish I could go to a place like the Mayo Clinic to have every test they could possibly perform done on me. I don’t mean for this to sound like a “pity me” story. That went by the wayside a long time ago.

By providing your email address, you are agreeing to our privacy policy.

This article represents the opinions, thoughts, and experiences of the author; none of this content has been paid for by any advertiser. The team does not recommend or endorse any products or treatments discussed herein. Learn more about how we maintain editorial integrity here.

Join the conversation

Please read our rules before commenting.

Community Poll

Have you taken our In America Survey yet?