Pain of My Life

My suffering started very early in my life about second or third grade I had constant headaches my mother decided it was time to see the doctor who promptly said I needed to see an optometrist who diagnosed me with farsightedness which led to glasses. Well that was a bad deal as the glasses complicated my vision making my headaches worse I told my mom who said your making this up, after I couldn't take it any more I broke my glasses and of course got into trouble I was taken to a different Eye doc who said I had 20-20 big choker I was not having a headache this visit while I was at original time of diagnosis. Since then the headaches auras, nausea and all the symptoms continued I was told it was sinusitis and a dry climate was my only surefire cure to this struggle (this was in my late teens).

I went into the Army after high school where even though it was a dryer climate then my home state of MI my problems persisted. I being a stubborn male just dealt with the pain tried to work through them even though my work environment was not ideal, I worked for the family construction business and always caught crap from my Dad about calling in or just having to stop because of the pain. It really hurt or relationship because he couldn't accept that a headache could be that debilitating.

After my marriage to a medical professional she made me go see the doctor again, who said it sounds like migraines, she referred me to a neurologist who put me on many different meds some of which are now off the market due to side effects. I quit going to her because all she did was up the dosage every visit that I told her that my headaches were no better. Now that I am in my 40s and have lived with this for so long sometimes I can use the mind trick and control the severity and other times all I can do is close my eyes and wait. I have noticed what I call "Grained Rage" during the most severe of my headaches I feel horrible for being so short fused and angry especially with my twin daughters, my wife knows I am not being that way because of her but my girls think that I am truly mad at them. It wasn’t until today with the rage article that I believe they kind of understand, having them read some of the comments seem to help so thanks to all of you who responded to that.

The only med that seems to help is Excedrin Migraine everything else seems to either have to many side effects that inhibit my job as a construction forman, my guys know when I am having one just by my mood changes and body language thank god they are a great group of guys and understand and pick up my slack when I get a real bad one.

I apologies for any misspellings I am typing in the dark and I am not very proficient in the light


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