Throughout my life and getting more intense and frequent

My mom tells me the first headache she knew about was when I was 2. I held my head and cried and wanted darkness. The first I remember is from 1st grade. I had a horribly mean teacher and I was a stressed out child. My parents fought, which caused stress. I've always been a worrier.

The headaches last 2 days - I wake up with it and then by the 2nd afternoon, it was usually gone around 4 or 5pm. They used to occur every month or every two months. As I've gotten older - I'm 36 now - they have changed. Sometimes longer, more frequent (every week or every other week), and more intense. I find myself panicking, which compounds the stress issue. When I was 31 I got pregnant and only had 4 during that time, but they were memorable. Very painful. Since then they've been more frequent and lasted up to 14 days.

The only times I don't recall having headaches was a couples between ages 18 and 20 and for 4 months I spent working in a wilderness area. I've kept journals (food, activity, sleep patterns, stress levels), changed diets and food/drink eliminations many times, exercised, seen numerous doctors, taken stupid amounts of various medications. Ibuprofen and Tylenol don't even touch it, but I still try. Sometimes it takes the edge off. None of this helped. I tried medical marijuana in my mid-20's and never slept so much in my life - didn't relieve pain, just made me fall asleep and not care. And then at 35 I tried psychadelics. Could have been a coincidence, but it worked. The pain and the headache went completely away. I'm reluctant to keep doing that, so have not tried again. My massage therapist suggested I microdose with psychadelics but it doesn't seem like a good idea in the ling term.

Recently I found a new primary care who gave me 5mg Risotripan tablets. Yesterday after having a headache at work all day, I took one around 6pm and it went completely away - not even residual of it. Then I woke up at 3:45am with a pounding migraine once again. Took another one and while it helped immensely, I can feel it will be back.

These things are debilitating. I've learned over time to just keep going. I cannot be incapacitated as often as I have these headaches. Before I knew it would be gone in 2 days, now I don't have that assurance and I panic. I'm frustrated and am not sure what to do. I'm sure my family is sick of hearing it after 30+ years and quite frankly I'm sick of talking about it. I'd go back to the 2-day headaches happily compared to this new up to 14 day thing. Bleh.

Thanks for listening / reading :)

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