My Migraine Journey
It started with pressure building up in my head before storms. When the rain came down, I would feel almost euphoric relief from the pain. It became lingering headaches throughout the day. I was soon taking Excedrin, Advil, and Tylenol all day every day (not together).
My first neurologist experience
My first appointment with my doctor in 2017 led to a neurologist referral with MRI tests and bloodwork. I was told I was taking too much OTC pain meds and had to stop. I was by then also drinking coffee daily to function at work. I was still taking OTC pain meds when it was really bad.
Trying to find the right migraine treatment
I was approved for Botox by my insurance and received 31 injections to my forehead, face, and neck. It was the worst experience I have ever had. The Botox locked the pain in place. For three months, I had amazing eyebrows but was in so much pain. That neurologist has since refused to treat me because of how bad my reaction was to the injections.
I found another neurologist who put me on Topamax. I had to stop taking it because it made me sick to the point I would almost pass out. That neurologist I stopped going to see because she didn't take my growing pain seriously. She also confused my medical condition with another patients, violating HIPPA with me. I never went back.
Migraine and my mental health
By this time, the migraine was no longer a series of attacks. I was in pain consistently, every day. My mental health was also suffering, so my regular doctor prescribed antidepressants. I had lost my job and applied for disability. I was feeling like a complete failure at life. I hated the emotionally numb way the antidepressants made me feel and weaned myself off. I was given propranolol to relieve the pressure but it gave me the worst nightmares. I also noticed changes in my pulse, a fluttering feeling not there before. A pharmacist told me to stop taking it and gave instructions how to do so immediately.
Migraine treatment trial and error
I could go on about the various medications I have tried. Ultimately, they do not work for me. From Imitrex to Aimovig, my use of migraine-specific medication has not been successful. They do not relieve pain, pressure and have only added complications to my life.
My entire body now suffers consistently. COVID only made things worse by amplifying sensitivities to noise and my sense of touch.
Migraine treatment and lifestyle changes
I have tried lifestyle changes as well. My next goal is to eliminate all processed foods. Eating vegetarian or vegan meals tastes better, feels better but has no effect on my pain levels or consistent discomfort. I am seriously at a loss on what to do or how to keep living like this. I have no motivation, no desire to keep going when the reward is more pain. I do push myself sometimes and pay dearly for it.
The migraine community has helped me
I am here because I read the stories, the forums, and it helps me not feel so alone. This place has recently helped me stay sane. I'm the only one in my family who suffers like this. It makes me question myself at times. "Am I faking? Is it really this bad? Am I not doing all I can?" When I push myself to do better, be better, my entire body punishes me. My illness is real, my pain is real and my limitations are real. Accepting this is so hard at times.
I don't wish this on anyone.
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