Profiles in Courage: Annie Seeks Joy and Meaning Within Pain

By Holly Harding

1 min read

A head injury at the age of 9 started Annie’s journey with chronic migraine. She also has fibromyalgia. After 11 car accidents over her lifetime and nearly a dozen surgeries, she doesn’t consider herself lucky. These many challenges have set her on a path to find meaning within her constant and severe pain.

Navigating the pain of migraine

An active community member on the site, Annie was inspired by “The Guilt Trip of Migraine,” an article on Migraine.com. She ran with the idea of becoming friends with pain rather than expending energy fighting it day after day. She now inspires others with her positive approach as she lives in the moment and looks for “Joy Shots” throughout the day. Annie helps us understand her journey and “Mindful Appreciation” philosophy for navigating pain in this interview with Holly, the author of the article that inspired her.

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azreynolds Member
It just occurred to me that it doesn't say here that none of those 11 car accidents were my fault! Seriously, it's like I'm a magnet for bad drivers. Lol. You can't imagine how many drunks have hit me too. Really sad.
Jan ML Member
I suffered from daily migraines for 25 years (ages 35 to 60) and did indeed “fight” them for the first few years. I even considered suicide but decided against that because I had two young sons who needed me. I finally resolved to simply accept the fact that I would always be in pain and had to learn to live with that. Part of my living with the pain involved narrowing my activities down to only those that I really enjoyed – rather than those that I felt obligated to do but didn’t really offer me any joy or satisfaction. Thus, I turned down requests to volunteer for my neighborhood association (didn’t much like the people involved) but I did accept a request to volunteer as a part-time science teacher at my sons’ school, a position that I loved. I also returned to some of the hobbies that I’d enjoyed as a child (collecting rocks, fossils, shells, etc.) but had given up in favor of a career (attorney) that had never really given me much joy (and which I could no longer pursue due to the migraines). Ultimately, all of my new activities led me to a part-time job at a natural history museum, a place where I could indulge both my passions for collecting and teaching, and which also made it possible for me to be at home and to spend more time with my sons when they returned from school. Thus, while I can’t say that I appreciate the fact that I was saddled with chronic migraines throughout much of my life (and I still regret that I couldn’t have helped my husband more in financially supporting our household), the migraines did force me to find what was really important to me and concentrate on those things rather than on things that didn’t really make me happy. 
1. Melissa Arnold Community Admin
 <inline-mention username="Jan ML" user-id="3763868"/> I love this, Jan! Life is too short to spend it on things that are joyless or unfulfilling. Some people never learn this -- I still struggle with what a mentor called "should"ing myself ... weighing myself down with all the things I feel like I "should" do, but ending up depleted and frustrated. While it's unfortunate you ended up with migraines, it seems like the life you have built now is a reasonably happy one. Glad to have you here! -Melissa, <a href='https://migraine.com' target='_blank'>migraine.com</a> team
2. hitesh-goenka Member
 <inline-mention username="Jan ML" user-id="3763868"/> Migraines also forced me to find what is important in my life. It's writing. After a few years of practice, I have taken it up full time now as I am unable to do anything (that is considered mainstream/practical) well. What's the point in struggling with something you don't like and are unable to compete with others? Better follow my passion instead.
azreynolds Member
<inline-mention username="Jan ML" user-id="3763868"/> , <inline-mention username="shayla.oakes" user-id="4211428"/> , I agree with y'all. Being so limited in life actually forces us to decide what's truly important. For me it was my husband and dog, gardening, watercoloring and cooking. Since I can't go out in public because of these new strong smelling detergents, I had to find joy inside my house. But I'm so blessed to own many of my father's paintings and old family antiques and furniture which all bring me joy. Add in a funny dog, sweet hubby and good food, how can I not be happy?!
Melissa Arnold Community Admin
Annie, so happy to see the face behind such a lovely part of our site! 😀 I really enjoyed the conversation you had here with Holly -- the video format was very cool. The perspective you bring to the community is so important and I'm grateful to know the site was a part of that process for you. Thanks for doing this. 😁 (Holly, did you cut your hair or just pull it back? I love it!) With gratitude to you both, Melissa, <a href='https://migraine.com' target='_blank'>migraine.com</a> team
azreynolds Member
<inline-mention username="Melissa Arnold" user-id="3827796"/> , Yes, those "coulda, woulda, shouldas" can not only weigh you down, but also drag you down into full blown depression if you let it. They can be very dangerous unhelpful thoughts. Exactly the kind that <a href='https://PainTrainer.org' target='_blank' rel='noopener noreferrer ugc'>PainTrainer.org</a> teaches you to avoid. I used to spiral down into depression thinking of all I lost in my life. Not just friends and family, but the enjoyment and satisfaction from my job answering a help line for people trying to get their GEDs, and church volunteer work. So now I stop myself by singing " Stop, in the name of love". Lol. Seriously! I literally force myself to redirect my thoughts. And how can you be sad singing the Supremes?!! (Perfect name for them, huh?) Anyway, I really, really enjoyed meeting Holly face to face. It would be so cool if we could all meet that way from time to time, wouldn't it? My hubby works for the Brain Alliance of KY and holds different support group meetings via Zoom every week. Sometimes I walk by and say hi as I pass through the house (not unlike Holly's dog😊). These BIAK support group meetings are so important to all who attend because for some of them, whom are limited in movement and can't drive, it's their only outlet. Now with Zoom they all can see each other and have become good friends. Since I'm lacking "in person" friends, people I've met through migraine social networking sites have become my friends. I've become very close with a few too. But having a real interaction is so much nicer than a texting....but I'm not complaining!! I always had penpals as a child. BTW, I told my team on MigraineTeam about the interview and several have visited to see it. So hopefully they will join <a href='https://migraine.com' target='_blank'>Migraine.com</a>. Y'all have such wonderful articles with great information and suggestions, I feel everyone with migraines should join. I don't know how I found y'all back in 2018, but I'm sure glad I did. The <a href='https://migraine.com' target='_blank'>migraine.com</a> email is a big joy shot for me every time I see one come in. 😍 I always grab a cup of joe and give myself plenty of time to read as many articles as I can. 👍☕
Lisa Robin Benson Moderator & Contributor
Dear Annie and Holly, This video is my JOY SHOT today! Thank you for that! 😀 LIsa
1. Holly Harding Moderator & Contributor
 <inline-mention username="Lisa Robin Benson" user-id="3807475"/> love that! thank you so much for that comment! Warmly, Holly (migraine.com team).

Profiles in Courage: Annie Seeks Joy and Meaning Within Pain

Navigating the pain of migraine

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