Running out of time
I returned to the workforce 1 5 years ago after 4.5 years not working due to chronic migraine. I am in the last few days of my FMLA (about 14 days) and I would like advice or suggestions. I now have a headache/migraine specialist but so far the meds continue to not be 100% effective. Without my job, I cant get the current medications I am taking (insurance covers all). However, my job is currently a stress trigger. The pain intensity is almost worse than it was before I started working again. The migraines never stopped but dealing with them now is more draining. Quitting my current job isnt an option but being terminated for absences isnt either. I have the option to flex or work extra hours but spending more time being stressed doesnt seem wise. I would appreciate any professional or medical suggestions from people who have been here before.
I spend time on computers and talking to people the entire work day. There are noise and light triggers I cannot avoid. On days I go to the office, I deal with sensitivities to odors. Working from home has helped some but not much. Im trying not to give up but some days feel harder than others. Today is one.
hi
- Grateful you took the time to share these questions with us. May I ask a few questions about your situation? When you stopped working 15 years ago did you go on some kind of leave? Short or long-term disability (STD or LTD) through your work at that time? Or did you secure Social Security Disability (SSDI) benefits? And what made you return to work after the 4.5 years? Did some kind of coverage run out or were you feeling an improvement?
Does your current employer offer STD or LTD benefits? These types of benefits can extend your insurance coverage. How would you feel about pursuing SSDI coverage? SSDI offers Medicare to assist with medications. We are happy to send you information about these options if you are interested.
As you know from your previous experience- removing the stressor of work does not stop the cycle of migraine. It can remove one of the triggers (stress). I was sidelined from my career 12 years ago and went through the process of short term, then long-term disability benefits and am now covered by social security as well. We're interested to learn more about your history and what you're open to applying for at this juncture. We are here to provide support, compassion, and information anytime. Warmly - Holly - migraine.com teamHi
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I had been working when the migraines started. I worked for 4.5 years before I lost that job. I did file for disability, received it and still am considered disabled (the return to work program). I returned to work 1.5 years ago because I want to travel, live on my own and do other things. I was wanting to fight this worthless feeling by doing something. At my age, people can be so judgemental of what they dont understand. I have also been hard on myself because I havent done anything I wanted to do.
This new job originally started off easy, some triggers but manageable. The tasks have since changed and have become more demanding. They do have disability programs I am looking into.
I have a new primary doctor who does not know me and Im not sure she believes me. I dont know if she will help me get the support I need. My current headache specialist isnt a Dr but she is good. She knows what meds are new and is working with me.
The fact my job is a main source of triggers now is difficult. The noise, the lights and no long break from them is draining.I am grateful you helped me understand your situation more fully. I had misunderstood your first post to mean you'd taken 15 years rather than 1.5 years off from work through the return to work program.
I completely relate to the feeling of shame related to being on disability. It's so unfortunate that society places this kind of feeling on those of us who are forced to the sidelines from our careers due to conditions we never chose. Migraine is a particularly tricky disease in this way due to its invisible nature. People are quick to judge and question us for being fakers - using a migraine attack to get out of a situation we don't want to have to partake in. As if it's a choice. In reality, I have found people with migraine to be the biggest fakers out there- but in the opposite way. Most people with migraine are faking wellness when they are very ill in order to try to participate in life's important events or to keep up with their work commitments: https://migraine.com/living-migraine/faking-wellness. It is a major head trip to receive this kind of judgment. And it can drive many of us to continue working (or return to work) when we are too ill to do so.
It sounds like you have a lot going on with looking into disability benefits through this current position while navigating a newish relationship with the doctor you mentioned. As I'm sure you know, having been through this before, the relationship we share with our doctor is key when it comes to pursuing benefits. Finding the right doctor is so important:https://migraine.com/living-migraine/evaluating-doctor-patient-relationship-right-fit. I'm confused by your statement that your migraine specialist isn't a doctor. Whatever the case, hopefully, that person can provide the support you need for benefit applications, medications, etc.
I'm assuming you've tried to work with your current job to make accommodations to the lighting (if at all possible) in your work area - and/or allow you to wear ear protection to block the noise. I'm not sure of your work environment and what is and is not possible. If unavoidable, leaving that position may be inevitable. Of course, that doesn't mean doing nothing. There are other positions (many work-from-home options) that allow you to control your environment.
Working can inspire a feeling of making an impact in the world and improve a sense of self-worth. That said, I have found that redefining the way I define my impact and self-worth is very helpful. Instead of focusing on how much or little I am dedicating to a job, I focus on how much and the way in which I love and care for my friends and family. Shifting my focus has helped me let go of the stress about not working in the traditional sense.
That said, the way migraine impacts our ability to work- and the invisible nature of the disease are demanding and difficult. You are not alone in this. It can help to come here and connect with others in the same situation. Glad you are with us. Keep in touch about how you decide to proceed. We are with you to talk things through. Warmly - Holly - migraine.com team
*** Update ***
I applied for work accommodations and was denied as my request would cause "undue hardship" for the company. I am waiting on the decision for my Long term disability claim. I have already prepared myself for a negative outcome but I am hoping for the best.Hi
- Thanks so much for taking the time to update us on your progress towards securing accommodations at work. How unfortunate that they weren't able to follow through with your request 🙁. I can tell from your post that you are open to working and are willing to push through this barrier if your employer showed even an inkling of acknowledgement towards your sound and light sensitivity. My hope is that your long-term disability claim will be in your favor!
Sending positive thoughts your way, and look forward to an update once you know more info. The community is here for you! - Cody (Team Member)
