Woman frowns while sniffing exterior odor

Frustration With My Stinkin’ Triggers!

I find it wild that I can be so sensitive to light. It’s synonymous with life and growth. It helps crops flourish and keeps people all over the world illuminated. Sometimes, when I think about, I feel like my triggers can be ridiculous. I mean here I am, a human being, who gets triggered when sunlight aggressively peeks out from behind a tree.

Migraine triggered by the suns rays

When sunlight peers out from behind trees, or anything fairly vertical, especially when there is a mist or fog in the air, creates what are known as “god rays.” This beautiful phenomenon is often sought after in movies and photographs, adding an eerie layer of dramatic effect akin to spiritual wonder; especially in forests. Where nature thrives and the rays are at their most beautiful.

Frustrations with migraine triggers

Like how can somebody get a migraine from something as essential and ever-present as light? I find myself frustrated in a very unique way, having several but distinct kinds of frustrations.

  1. I am helpless and I grieve
  2. Things happen out of my control, so I get feisty and try to fight the system (I call that going rogue)
  3. I feel stuck but have to laugh it off due to how ridiculous everything is

Why is my migraine triggered by light?

Sometimes my triggers warrant that third one. Not in a HAHAHAHA THIS IS GREAT way. More, I mean, come on... How is a person supposed to function in society if I can’t even be in my kitchen because it has a flickering florescent ceiling light? How would I survive in the wild if I am rendered incapacitated by an aggressive or loud smell? The traits of a human being?

Celebrating my birthday

It’s funny in a sick way. This September, I got to celebrate my 24th birthday. When I say got, I mean I did what I could and what was safe given our collective circumstances. Though I may not like to admit it, going out to eat with only my immediate family and playing video games, online, with my friends, is sorta what I always do when I celebrate. The events of 2020 have proven to me that I’m not as social as I thought and maybe not much has changed in my social life!

Migraine triggered by the scent of cleaning products

Anyway, We went out to this gorgeous breakfast and lunch joint, where they had crepes and specialty cinnamon pancakes that would melt your face off. We were actually the only people there!

It was great! What wasn’t so great was that the hostess started to mop up the floor with bleach, or some other aggressively stinky chemical.

Releasing frustration with laughter

Like I get you need to clean and nobody else is here, but you did a swipe around the table, effectively turning our table into a crepe island surrounded by a stink moat!

In that moment, rather than grieve or find ways to get back at the situation. I laugh. I found jest in how magnificently ridiculous this notion was! Not because it was funny, but because my expression was the only thing I could control in this situation. A release of tension.

Trying to find control over migraine

Thankfully, I did carry my migraine medication with me, yet I feel like its so ridiculous that something like light or smell can affect me so harshly. Can't I just enjoy the world like a wee bit?

Just because I find my triggers wild doesn’t mean I don’t take them seriously, or don’t become frustrated in those other ways too. I just find that if I can, I’ll try and take control of my migraine frustration with hyperbole. That the situation I find myself in is just so stinking ridiculous!

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