Receiving Emotional Support with Migraine
Chronic pain can be lonely. It can feel like too heavy of a load to carry alone.
We want to feel supported through the long days of debilitating pain and the endless cycles of unpredictability. Yet as we turn to our family and friends for that support, the reality is most people don’t understand that migraines are more than just a headache. They don’t understand that they are a complex neurological condition that can cause debilitating pain. So, we can find ourselves living in an awkward “in-between” space. We want to feel supported, but we’re living a reality that most people don’t understand. Their check-ins are well intended, but “feel better soon,” can feel so empty.
As your fellow migraine sister, I want to share with you what has worked for me, and I would love to hear in the comments below what is working for you.
What role do loved ones play?
First, I had to remind myself that not everybody is going to understand migraine, nor are they meant to. Different people in our lives serve different roles. Just as we are meant to serve different roles in each of our loved ones’ lives, so are they in our lives. It can be incredibly healing and freeing to see this and release those who have not be able to show up for us in the way that we had hoped, wanted, and needed. Certainly, every situation is different.
You will have to discern how this applies (or doesn’t apply) in your life. This is simply to help us sharpen on focus on who can best support us.
How can you identify your migraine supporters?
Start by identifying where you need the most support in your life and which two to three people in your life can support you in that area. I would encourage you to making sure that you have someone to support you emotionally. Yes, you can have the person who helps to run errands for you when you’re not feeling well, so you can receive the refill to your prescriptions and food in your refrigerator. But it’s also really helpful to have someone who can support you with the emotional rollercoaster of living with migraine.
Who is best for emotional support?
It’s easy to assume that the people closest to us, will be the ones to support us emotionally, but that’s simply not true. The person to provide the best emotional support may be your best friend, a sibling, or even someone that you’ve connected with in a migraine community like this one!
What emotional support do you need?
Allow yourself the time and space to identify the emotional support that you need, and then go out and find it. In some cases, seeking the support of a counselor or therapist may be a great resource for you. Explore all your options.
Processing emotions can be so healing and therapeutic on many levels. It may take a little time and energy upfront, but it can make life with migraine just a little easier, and I think we can all say yes to that!
I’m curious, what helps you to receive the support that you need living with migraine? Will you share below so we can learn from you too?
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