Who Am I With Chronic Illness? Do I Still Matter?

I must admit that I do have multiple chronic health conditions. I believe there is hardly a time in which something is not flaring up, or, a procedure is not going on. Does this mean that my life is not meaningless? No!! No matter what is going on, I still have a purpose and am somebody.

So...who am I?

Mother and grandmother

I have a lot of titles, but my favorite is that of being a mother and a grandma, aka “Bramma.” I have two adult kids (son and a daughter). I am still active in their lives. As my kids age, I still think of them as my heartbeats.

One of my children has three kids. I see the grands, or at least talk to them, weekly. I am fortunate that we all live only a few minutes from each other. I buy a few things for my children, but just love doing for the grandkids. They know how to convince “Bramma” to order pizza, buy toys, or just let them come over.

Friend and listener

I grew up on the East Coast, but have lived in Texas for almost 25 years. Throughout this time, I have met many people. Some have moved, and even returned, once or twice. This is the beauty of being in a military town.

I love getting to know people. I am that person who may have long conversations with strangers. Of course, my children did not appreciate that when younger. What was supposed to be a 5-minute store run, could have easily turned into an hour.

I still have friends all over. No matter where a person is: online, next door, or states away, I am still that listening ear. I do not mind just letting someone vent. Listening is a quality many wish they had. I love checking in on people. Writing or sending cards, is another of my pastimes. Who does not enjoy getting snail-mail?!

Baker

It is a surprising fact that I love to bake. I rely on artificial nutrition (TPN) through my port. Because of my gastrointestinal dysmotility, I do not eat meals. I occasionally miss all the sweets, but, take pride in being able to still make others’ mouths happy.

On my decent days, I bake. Sometimes, even if I have a slight headache or am mildly nauseated, baking will take my mind off my symptoms temporarily. Baking is one form of therapy for me.

Volunteer and servant

I also love helping others. I have always believed that my mission on Earth was to be of service in any way that I can.

Over the years, this has changed slightly. I volunteered at different areas of my church, from the nursery to being a greeter. I used to assist at my kids’ schools. Being the Sponsorship Chair for Relay for Life and a military special needs camp, were big roles to fill, but rewarding.

Currently, I do not do as much as I used to. I still volunteer, but mostly behind the scenes. I help a friend by doing an online drive for the homeless annually. I can even order the hygiene items online for her to distribute.

Advocate

Over time, I started advocating. This is not just for me, but for many with chronic illnesses. My main areas are, of course for migraine, but also for gastroparesis, primary immunodeficiency, and rare disease awareness/change.

Who am I outside of migraine?

My point is, even with an illness in which you are forever changed, you still matter. I believe, even if one is in bed most of the time, or on occasion, there are things out there for you. It could be something as simple as calling or texting someone in your good moments. You may not be able to do what you used to, but try to find things that are doable and bring you comfort.

Change may be inevitable, but you have a purpose.

What are some things that bring you joy? Let us know.