Collision

Please note: This is a difficult one to read. But this is the experience I had. I can’t sugarcoat it.

My experience with driving and migraine

The way my well-wishers tell me to drive a car makes me wonder if they are okay with the aftermath. Are they okay with me having a flare-up? I usually have a flare-up after a few minutes of driving.

Are they okay with me not having control of the wheel? The two-dozen symptoms make sure that I never have control the way it is supposed to be given the fact that driving is a risky endeavour.

Car accidents due to migraine

Are they okay with me getting into minor accidents? A nick here and there whether it be people or objects happened all the time. It ran into more than a hundred over fourteen years. Somehow, I was saved by the grace of god as I was never beaten up by anyone. But there were occasions when I would have. Multiple such occasions came my way.

One time I touched a car halted in front of me in the traffic. Two men stepped out in a hurry and stared at me. They didn’t do anything since my mother was next to me. One time I touched a police officer who was on a motorcycle. He stopped in front of me and stared at me. He too left me in peace which was only possible because my mother was next to me. The time when I was almost beaten up was when I touched the leg of a pillion rider on a motorcycle. The car was full of my family members. Still, the pillion rider got down and banged his fists on the car. I didn’t stop and went to my destination which was a housing society where he wasn’t allowed inside. I was saved that day after a few seconds of being chased by the motorcycle.

Are my well-wishers okay with me getting into major accidents? I had three big accidents where the cost of the car repair went into thousands of Indian rupees. One accident had an expense of fifteen thousand INR after the insurance deduction. On all three occasions, I was not beaten up. I wonder how I escaped something which I have witnessed several times on the roads of Kolkata, India.

Why I stopped driving

The funny thing is that even after all the accidents I wasn’t told to stop driving. Why will I be told to stop driving if I cite the flare-ups in my symptoms which is usually seen as an excuse for not driving?

I need to confess my love for driving. Yes, even after the additional suffering from this activity, I enjoyed it. When my symptoms go away, I will start driving again. Till then, I won’t.

The reason why I stopped driving since two years is the same reason why I stopped riding a bicycle since two years as well. The risk of accidents and flare-ups made me stop. It was a rational thing to do.

What my well-wishers have to say about the arguments for not driving is that I should not get bogged down by obstacles in life. Accidents happen. Learn from them and move on. You should drive a little if not too much. It would be best if you did not give up. Driving is required for emergencies. Without practice, you will suffer one day.

Talking about emergencies, I am confident I can drive. It’s a part of my system. I have fourteen years of experience. I may be a bit hesitant at first. But a kilometre would be enough for me to get into the driving mood. Eventually, I will pick up pace and confidence after crossing a few kilometres.

Why do others care if I drive or not?

I would love to ask them if it’s not possible for them to digest the truth, it’s better to stop the pointless harping on the need of my driving. What affects me doesn’t affect them. What if I kill someone? Will it be okay? Will it be considered a one-time mistake which should make me a better driver? What if I kill someone else? Wait... there can’t be someone else. Once I do, I will be imprisoned for life. I am not a rich person. I am not a powerful person who can get out of such a situation. I will perhaps rot in prison for the rest of my life.

I wonder what my well-wishers wish for me. A definite flare-up along with the possibility of an accident?