Whole Life Sufferer

I am an artist that likes to watch things grow. i cannot hold a job any longer due to the severity of my migraines. I have lots of hobbies to keep me busy when i am well.

Currently i get migraines 15 days a month...it doesn't leave many days to feel 100%. I have had migraines since i was about five. I wasn't diagnosed till i was 18 years old. It was very tough when i was younger because i only felt sick.There wasn't much head pain involved or any symptoms. The pain and symptoms didn't show till i was 17-18.

Me and my mom were going through old photos when we found one from the time when i was in elementary school on a field trip. It was a picture of all the kids lined up against the wall waiting for a street car to come. I was the only one who was sitting on the ground with my hand on my head and the look of extreme exhaustion and pain all over my face. At that point we realized that i had had them longer then we had previously thought...

After i was diagnosed, it was meds after meds. There wasn't much else offered to me. Pretty much "Here are your meds. your suffer from chronic migraines, be on your way". Most of which didn't help or they tended to make me feel worse. My best avenue was to abandon the meds and find other options. Everything from Imatrex, Amerge, Maxalt, Naproxen, and Sandomigran. The last med on the list is the only one that seemed to have worked over the years. Unfortunately in the past month i have had a bad reaction to it. I am currently waiting for an appointment with my neurologist to find new meds. i took it upon myself to educate myself on my condition as much as i possibly could.

My symptoms include everything... numbness in the left arms and left leg along with facial numbness. I have sensitivities to lights and sounds. I even sometime smell things that aren't even there. When i was younger vomiting and fainting were big ones. Not so much anymore thank goodness. I have dizzy spells along with vertigo. i have auras so losing vision, or blocked vision occurs. Not to mention the sparkles that float around. i also on occasion have a bad metal taste in my mouth before a migraine. The same taste as when you touch your tongue to a battery. Lately the newest one is this strange throbbing in my left hand three fingers and my thumb. somehow the pinky gets left out. it's kinda like attaching a tens machine to your hand and putting it on full strength. That's just the bare minimum. there is nothing like wearing sunglasses in the house on a cloudy day. :)

As for the other issues... there are not a lot of people out there who understand how hard it is to life each day not knowing what you are capable of. I've loss work, friends, schooling, relationships and even family members have a hard time with understanding what it is all about. i do believe that if you haven't suffered one you will never truly get it. i have had a few people over the years that were helpful, but way more who were not.

On the upside i find that there are a lot of things in life that i would have over looked if i wasn't sick. In a weird kind of way it makes me be very thankful for my good days. It makes me more appreciative of the good times and all the little things that have come to mean way more then anything else. simple things like watching the birds in my backyard or having a full afternoon to paint.

I am very grateful for the days and always look forward to the next one