How and when do you tell your boss that you suffer with migraines?
I've started a side job (once a week) in addition to my regular job.
I already told my boss I want to work 4 - 5 hrs per shift, however I've been asked to do a 6.5 hr shift (this job requires standing for these hours) My concern is that when I get a migraine I can not work for that length of time. What do you say to your boss in this case?
pennych, that's a great question. Have you disclosed you have a neurological disease called migraine to your new boss yet? It's a very personal decision. You can explain as much as you feel comfortable with based on what your boss is willing to receive from you. They may be a person who understands the impact and burden of migraine disease. You never know. Working with migraine disease may mean you will need some flexibility and grace while you attempt to manage your symptoms during an attack. If the business has a Human Resources department it is a good idea to let them know your needs as well for documentation purposes. You have many options to explore based on what your needs will be. Here are some links to have a look that may be helpful to you.
https://migraine.com/forums/do-you-work-with-migraines-share-your-experience-here
https://migraine.com/living-migraine/work-fmla-experience
I hope this helps. Let us know how you do moving forward. Warmly, Cheryl migraine.com teamThank you Cheryl, I will check the links you provided. The job is at a small family business, ice c ream and cookie shop so there is no HR staff. What do I say to ephasis that at the initial interview I asked for a 4 - 5 hr shift?
, you could reiterate that you asked for shorter shifts to help manage your health condition better. You can offer specifics at that point if you are comfortable doing so. I would hope a family-owned business would be receptive to your request. You know your body better than anyone, right? It will work out if it is a good fit for everyone. Warmly, Cheryl migraine.com team
Thank you Cheryl, your reply is much appreciated!
Hi Penny, did you talk to your boss yet? Just want to send you a hug and support. This stuff can be tricky to navigate, but remember that you have the right to ask for help. -Melissa, migraine.com team
Hi Melissa, Thank you for following up. Yes, I sent my boss a text yesterday, I did reiterate (as Cheryl advised) that in the interview I mentioned, I can work up to a 5 hr shifts due to the times when I have my migraines and take medication, need to power through my shift. I gave him 2 options as to when I can work. He replied with " I understand" and chose one of the work times I suggested. Wow, what a surprise!
On a more personal note, I've also been reading that early childhood trauma can cause migraines. I don't know how much research has gone into this study, the link below. The feelings that came up with having to confront my boss is the same feelings as was my relation ship with my parents. Never knowing how they will react and it was like walking on egg shells. I mostly received a negative response with any of my communication with them. And it seems that I had the same body sensations, in this case, anxiety, stomach upset, and this whole ordeal triggered a migraine
https://mantracare.org/therapy/ptsd-trauma/migraine-ptsd/#:~:text=Migraine%20and%20PTSD%20are%20two%20conditions%20that%20are,lead%20to%20better%20treatment%20options%20for%20both%20conditions, I'm so glad to hear you had a positive outcome with your boss. I have read trauma can affect people in many ways over time. The common thread seems to be a sensitivity to pain in our bodies. A migraine attack can certainly be painful. You may choose to explore it if you feel trauma from your past is negatively impacting you. Healing our bodies can take us down many paths. We are here to support you along those paths. I hope the attack you had passed quickly. I'll be praying for you. Warmly, Cheryl migraine.com team Just getting back to this conversation, Penny -- I'm so relieved to hear your boss was receptive when you stood up for yourself! That doesn't always happen, so it's a treat to see it work out. I hope their words are backed with action. Your thoughts about trauma and eggshells are fascinating to me. You seem to be very self-aware, which is a wonderful trait to have. It's true that emotional experiences and physical symptoms can exist in a feedback loop, and it could be a part of your unique migraine patterns, for sure. Have you ever considered therapy? I am a huge proponent of mental healthcare because it really is all connected -- and at the very least, having someone to listen and support you in a non-judgmental way can be a great comfort for people living with chronic conditions.
I also want to recommend that book "The Body Keeps the Score," which talks about the impact of emotional trauma on our physical health. I haven't read it yet, but it's well respected and has come up in previous conversations on this site. I believe our patient leader
has written about this, too, so maybe she'll have something to add here. Wishing you all the best at work and glad we can be a helpful resource for you! -Melissa, migraine.com team
