When I say I am in pain, it’s not just pain, but a culmination of various sensations. If it were just pain, it wouldn’t have bothered me this much in limiting my ability to do anything.
Pain reminds me of something acute that recently happened in my shoulders. More so for my right shoulder during the fortnight my nieces were at my place. They were 4 years old and I used to lift them up from the chair a few times a day. This led to pain in my shoulder region. The pain stayed throughout the time I lifted my nieces. It was further augmented when I lifted 3 suitcases from the car to the trolley at the airport. This kind of pain can be ignored and worked around. But not the pain that I get from migraines. I have tried ignoring them. When I get occupied with something, I may not be bothered by the pain to that extent but still, it interferes with whatever I do. I am able to ignore the shoulder pain easily but the other types of pain eat me alive.
My mother’s case is the same. Her pain also eats her alive. No wonder she has resorted to using painkillers for the last 3 years. I keep telling her not to. But she says, "You can go to your migraine cave and rest whenever you feel like. I can’t. I have to fulfill my marital duties". These words make me glad to have been a bachelor till now. I don’t know how I would tolerate anything above what life has thrown at me till now. As if two dozen symptoms are not enough. I need more drama in life on top of that neuro thing I have.
(I wrote this during the month of June 2023.)